Your Life ( and Style) IS American Idol!

YOUR LIFE AND STYLE IS AMERICAN IDOL

by Tamara Gold

Do you go through your day feeling kind of pitchy?

Or perhaps no one is listening to you and you want to yell out, “Hey dogg, listen up, listen up, listen up. Okay, dogg…..”

You even go to your favorite store, touch a few tubes of the new Tom Ford lipstick line and think, “I’m just not feeling it.”

Your husband hums in the shower and you find yourself saying, “Honey, I love you, but I’m worried about your song selection. With all the great pop songs out there what were you thinking by humming ‘Yellow Submarine?”

What I’m thinking is that life mirrors “American Idol.”

Think about it a moment: Just like on “Idol,” we wake up every morning, style ourselves in the best way possible and then go out on that great stage of life to put on our best performances. Sometimes we win; other times we’re stuck in the bottom three. A detractor can makes our lives miserable. Other times, our personal Simon says, “You went from zero to hero. Well done. ”

What are the deeper lessons of Idol that apply to your life, business and personal style?

Just like Simon tells us on Idol, please stay true to who you are.

It’s time to recognize your own unique talents and stay true to the best vision of you. Think about the singers on Idol who are some mish-mash of what they think everyone else wants them to be as an artist. Suddenly, they’re schitzo!  One week, they’re crooning a country song and the next they’re doing some Zeppelin. It’s confusing because everyone else wonders, “Who is this person?” Just like on Idol when you figure out the best version of you then stick with it. Think about Adam Lambert and Chris Daughtry who were always true to their unique visions. No one had either of them singing show tunes. Those songs just didn’t fit. People who are true to themselves can’t be anything else but beautiful and authentic.

Just like Paula used to tell us on Idol, show us a little more personality.

Don’t hide out. Your personality makes you magnetic and unforgettable. This is true when it comes to your personal style. Perhaps you’re like Crystal Bowersox this season and you dress like you live in a Seattle coffee shop. You know what? She’s perfect because her clothing reflects her true personality. Can you imagine how uncomfortable she would feel if they forced her to wear a tight mini skirt and low-cut shirt? Don’t let others dictate how you will present yourself to the world.

Do it your own way – because the world has enough cookie cutter types.

Your goal is to stand out from all of those who are simply auditioning. You don’t want to look like that cookie cutter girl with the same outfit, the same hair and even the same makeup. Your individuality will make you rise from the pack, and often this does start with clothing. Siobhan Magnus might wear a short tulle skirt with legwarmers and cowboy boots next week, but somehow it all works because she has style to stand out for the rest. Look at Adam Lambert. Like him or not, he commands the room from his ever-growing hair to his pointy-shoes.

Realize that everyone isn’t always a fan.

You can’t go through the day worrying if everyone will vote for you. There will be people who don’t like you or those who judge you harshly. Remember that Simon was rude to Jennifer Hudson and basically told her that she stunk. She was low in the top ten when she got kicked off “Idol,” disappeared and came back to win an Oscar and have a hit CD. Your detractors can and will be wrong. I’m sure Daughtry isn’t still upset that he didn’t win Idol or even come in as the runner up.

Make sure to appreciate the Ellen in your life.

There will always be someone who desperately wants you to win and sees the positive in you. He or she will make you laugh and smile like Ellen does on “Idol.” Cherish this person and let their compliments sink in.

Realize that we all make bad song choices.

Big Mike, I feel your pain on Beatles week. But realize that we all make a bad decision or two in life. You might even do it in front of a lot of people like those Idol contestants. But the key is you put yourself out there and someone will “get” your tune.

Finally, just like on Idol, polish yourself, grow and evolve as you go on.

Think about the Idol contestants on week one vs. the finale of the show. Of course, they’ve had major makeovers from top industry pros. They’ve been polished up and the gold has been tumbled until it shines. Most of the ladies begin as regular people and look like beautiful stars when it’s over. You can work on your own hair, face and clothing in the same manner. Realize it’s not an overnight fix. Heck, it takes those idols all season to really look fabulous.

Oh, one more. Everyone is a winner.

Yes, if you put yourself out there, stay true to who you are and focus on doing your best then how can you not become a winner?

Right, dogg?

Don’t Want to Be a Glamour-Puss…Or Do You?

Once upon a time — a long, long time ago in the ‘90s — we had a dream. It began at the top of our noggins with an ice-straight blowout and then we worked our way down to the D&G dress, Gucci purse and the fabulous jewelry that we couldn’t afford, but our benefactor Visa seemed to support.

No matter what the cost, we wanted one thing: To be glamorous. Even if we worked at the local mall stocking Haines tighty whities, we wanted to look like a movie star.

A funny thing happened after the economy collapsed. My clients are saying words that could have sent you to style penitentiary a few years ago.

“Tamara,” they lean in and confide. “I want to look good, but I don’t want to be too glamorous.”

This is an interesting phenomenon because while women want to be pretty – or even very pretty – they don’t want to be too much.

This leads me to ask you: When it comes to looks and style, what do you want? Do you want to be pretty or glamorous? A head turner or a heart breaker? Or are you still humming that U2 song when it comes to style -“I still haven’t found what I’m looking for?”

I think I can give you some resolve on this issue even if your own style has been in flux since you turned five. You do want to be pretty, but more importantly, you really need to step into who you are as a woman. Then the rest will fall into place.

Style isn’t an exercise in looking like Demi, Michelle or any number of these Jennifers or Jessicas floating around out there. Style is about finding the best shapes for you along with the best colors, best hair style, best clothes, best shoes… the best everything for just you. It’s not about what Reese is doing. Again, it’s about how you are as a woman.

Just a little side note: you might just get a little glamorous along the way when you figure this one out. Sorry, it’s the fallout of finally finding your unique style. Glamour is that little pouch of makeup samples they offer you with the big purchase. You could turn it down, but why would you?

When you finally figure out the real you,  how to pull it all together and polish up what you have..you just can’t stop it. The glamorous, gorgeous, glowing version of  YOU will be on display for all to see.

You will become that woman.

You know that women.

She’s the one who shows up at the PTA meeting in the black pants, simple white shirt, the great layered haircut and looks absolutely stunning.

Everything she’s done seems right. Her skin glows; her eyes shine and that damn hair swings in the right direction even when she sits by the air-conditioning vent. She isn’t worried about buying 10 pairs of black pants (because they all fit differently). One really is enough.

She is confident in her body. Even if it’s not perfect.

This blog is dedicated to you finding your best self. It’s not about vanity because there is a vast difference between vanity and beauty. Vanity is standing in front of a mirror and getting so lost that you can’t come up for air. The type of beauty we’ll find here is the type where you say, “This is what I have to work with in life. I’ll do my best with it. I’ll own it.”

Look at Jackie O. She was never the most gorgeous, but with those trademark sunglasses, classic cardigans, slim Capri’s and that perfect dark bob, she was stunning and classic.

Look at Michelle Obama who looks so much different since she has moved to Pennsylvania Avenue. During the campaign, she was beautiful, but now she has a new rock-solid confidence and has transformed into gorgeous. What could possibly be different other than she sent out change of address cards?

Answer: She owns her beauty.  She wears clothes from J. Crew and looks like she just stepped off a runway.

She’s not a perfect beauty, but most of us would be happy to feel that good about ourselves.

By the way, she looks quite glamorous to me now.  It’s just part of the deal.